FAQ Upated

Many folks have questions about our adoption, so we compiled a FAQ - "Frequently Asked Questions" list, with a ton of links and info. If you have questions, check out the FAQ by clicking here. If you have questions that aren't on the FAQ, please leave a comment, and we'll answer it. :-)

Pressure Valve & Decompression

I can't tell you enough what a relief it is that Emily has care now while we were gone. That was a big burden on my mind, and I'm so glad we found trustworthy, caring people to watch her and help us make this adoption possible. Praise God for working this out!!! It came about through circumstances that were seemingly coincidental, but we see that it's Providence, not coincidence. We can now shake out lots of stress and focus on getting ready to go.

Speaking of decompression... Fortunately the loan came through today, and will hit the account tomorrow, since all the purchases, tickets and travel fees have totally tapped us out... It's mac-n-cheese for awhile, but worth it to bring home a son. Sorry Dave Ramsey. Our accounts are deflated, but our spirits are bouyed.

SAINTS

Our favorite people right now are Karla/Kenny, Beth/Mike, Jenny/Ed and Terri/Drew. These wonderful people have stepped forward to watch Emily while we are gone. They are earning jewels for their heavenly crowns! This takes such a burden off of our shoulders; now we can focus on getting the other 100 things done that we need to accomplish before we leave!
Okay, I can't leave out Taylor, she is in charge of the cats and the grass while we are gone. She gets the 'wonderful' job of giving Romeo his meds and cleaning out the litter box, not to mention mowing the grass as needed.

A great big THANKS to all of you!!!

More about Robby

Many of you know that the older children adopted from China often have special needs and you may be curious about Robby. He has a condition called atresia-microtia. What this means is his ears did not form normally. We know that he is missing the upper half of his right external ear and some or all of his left ear. Additionally, both his ear canals are closed.

While he does have some hearing loss we know that he can hear, although you have to speak louder than normal conversational tones. We also know that he is able to talk and carry on conversations (of course they are all in Mandarin), and he knows over 300 words, and sings. Once we return to the States, we will have his hearing tested and see if he is a canidate to have his ear canals opened. This would increase his ability to hear. We have also looked into having his outer ears reconstructed and know that this is a possibility for the future.

New FAQ

Edited and updated to reflect new information... Last Updated 6/28/2007

This document attempts to answer the most frequently asked questions we get about our adoption, the adoption process, and our blog. Have a question you don't find??? Post a comment, and we'll answer it.

1. When?(travel/arrive/etc.)? We finally know our travel dates, and are flying out July 3.
2. Wow, a boy! We decided that we wanted to adopt a son, so adopted Xin Sha Gang, for a variety of reasons that are explained here and here. We're excited about getting a son!
   
3. Aren't all Chinese adoptees girls? While 92% of children eligible for adoption in China are girls, it's still a crap shoot. If there are boys, and someone requested one, they get one, otherwise, everyone gets girls like our cute little Rachael 丽彩 . Did we mention yet how cute she is??
   
4. What is your son's name? His Chinese name is Xin Sha Gang 新沙刚, meaning New Sand Strong. Xin ("new") is his surname, and Sha Gang ("sand strong") is his given (first) name. His English name will be Robert Adam Houser.
   
5. How old is he? Robby turned 4 on April 7, so will be just over 4 yrs. 3 mo. when we get him.
   
6. Where will you travel in China? After plane changes in Detroit and Tokyo (!) we will be in Beijing, then Ürümqi, where Sha Gang currently is, then on to Guangzhou (formerly Canton) for the immigration processing. From there, we fly to Tokyo, Detroit, then home, approximately 23 hours later. Funny enough, we'll be in the birthplace of fireworks on July 4, but likely won't see any fireworks this year. More trip details are here.
   
7. How long a flight is it to China? 12 hours to Japan, total of 21 hours, with 2 connections.
8. Do we get to sightsee? Yes. For sure, we will get to see the Great Wall and the Forbidden City, Tian'anmen Square, the Summer Palace, and the jade market in Beijing, plus visit hutongs in Beijing. We also have some side excursions in Ürümqi which are less certain. Beyond that, who knows?
9. Why all the tourist sight-seeing, and not just get your son and fly home? Three good reasons: Chinese law requires us to be in-country for a minimum of 2 weeks. Also, we need to be at 100% for our son, and that means rested and not jet-lagged. The 3 day buffer in Beijing permits paperwork to get done, last-minute travel arrangements, and very important rest from the 21 hour journey across 12 time zones. Finally, it's important we see Robby's country, so we can honor his culture and heritage, and do the best job possible at teaching him about it.
10. When in China will we get Robby? July 9, the day after we fly into Ürümqi. Full agenda here.
11. What's with the Cricket? Click here for details... We already knew Xin Sha Gang's name, so have been calling him Robby since month two, no nickname necessary.
12. Will we get to visit Robby's orphanage? No idea, we hope so!
13. Is Chinese adoption expensive? About $18,000 for typical infant adoption. We're traveling with 4 over and 5 back, so it's more.
14. When will Robby become a citizen? By current US immigration law, provided both parents travel to the adoption country, Robby will automatically be a U.S. citizen when the wheels of the plane touch U.S. soil.
15. When is the adoption process "done"? Legally, Robby is our son on July 9, a few hours after we get him. We'll be his legal guardians within a few minutes of meeting him, and then will legally be his parents later that day, after additional paperwork.
16. Do you need boy stuff? Yes, some, but we should be OK.
17. What do Emily, Kayla and Rachael think about getting a brother in the house? They are very very excited!

Have a question you don't find in the FAQ??? Then please help make this FAQ better by Posting a comment, and we'll answer it and add it to the FAQ.

What is time & temperature?

Want to know what time it is in Beijing, Ürümqi or Guangzhou?  Care to find out how roasting hot we are in China?  You can click here for Beijing, and here for Ürümqi.

Beijing and Guangzhou are 12 hours AHEAD of EDT, so add 1/2 day if you're in Eastern time zone. 

Urumqi technically is on the same time as Beijing, but is really two time zones later than Beijing, so lunch is at 2pm instead of noon... think Colorado for you EDT folks.  So, for observed time, subtract 2 hours from Beijing time (or add 10 to current EDT).

If you click on the Beijing link, you'll see that it's going to be 102 degrees on Monday, and 99 Fahrenheit the day we arrive.  Oy!

ITINERARY

We received our travel itinerary last night.

Tuesday July 3: Flying to China. We fly from Columbus to Detroit to Tokyo to Beijing. A total of 21 hours from departure to arrival. (Just tell us where the bed is!).

July 5th: rest and sightseeing--The Temple of Heaven and the South Church

July 6th: Hutong tour with lunch in a Chinese home, shopping at the craft market.

July 7: Jade factory, Great Wall Juyongguan Section, and the Summer Palace.

July 8: Tian An Men Square, Forbidden City, and worship in an international church. Fly to Urumqi, arrive at the airport at 10:10 pm.

July 9th: MEET ROBBY!!!!!!!!!! Do assorted paperwork for the adoption.

July 10th: Hongshan Park and Provincial Museum.

July 11th: Trip to Heavenly Lake in the mountains outside of Urumqi.

July12th: Shopping at the International Bazaar.

July 13th: Fly to Guangzhou in the afternoon.

July 14th: Get Robby's visa photo taken and have his medical exam.

July 15th: Free day (Shop, visit the local 'live market' etc).

July 16th: Evening river cruise on the Pearl River.

July 17th: Go to the US Consulate to take the adoption oath and get Robby's visa.

July 18th: Fly home Guangzhou to Tokyo to Detroit to Columbus. From the time we leave the hotel to our arrival in Columbus we will have a 23 hour trip! Can you say five cranky people arriving in Columbus. :)

Excitement building!!

Wow, we fly to get our son in just one week from tomorrow. This journey that has taken us 18 months to complete is now so close to becoming reality, which is humbling, invigorating and scary. Lots to do, so little time.

Unlike our last adoption trip, I'm actually going to use the digital video camera before we leave, so I don't repeat my past performance... walking around the Great Wall for an hour, only THINKING I was filming, when I was just a moron walking around with a camera NOT recording. DOH! So, we had very few actual pictures of the Great Wall, and no video -- not going to repeat that same mistake.

We have pictures to print and photo albums to assemble, last minute shots & prescriptions, shorts, sunglasses and dozens of small things to buy, loan to secure for the final big pu$h, and then pick up $11,000 in cash for me to strap to my body for a week until all the final payments are made. You ever contemplate the issue of walking around a country where you don't know cultural cues, while carrying a year's salary in cash strapped to your leg?

Anyway, I seem to have a billion things that only I can get done... finishing up projects for work, getting the final ISSA Treasury stuff banged out, finishing up my Toastmaster area progress by 6/30 to make President's Distinguished Area (BHAG goal), and I'm also photo/media/computer boy for the trip, so have lots of little things to finish off there as well. But, it's par for the course. This journey is about preparation, endurance and hope, and we've less preparation than we'd like, so lots of little things left.

But, let's keep things in perspective -- just 1 week left until we fly to get our son!!!

Emily Watch and Distress

Short version:
We desperately need your prayers and the grace of God to intervene.

Long version:
We're still working on finding someone to watch Emily, and that's very scary. If we can't get this covered, the adoption is off, we're likely barred from adopting again from China, and Xin Sha Gang may not be adopted for a long time, if ever. It would tear my heart out, and I would mourn the loss of my son.

We thought this was handled and done, and that we were covered, but we're not. We understand -- it's tough signing up to watch a special needs child, and not without careful consideration. I blame myself for not locking this in better and creating a contingency plan, but we can't beat ourselves up over it, what's done is done. We're on the edge of a precipice. No care for Emily, no adoption, it's that simple, and I'm apoplectic and troubled.

This stress on top of everything else is very tough to handle. I could only sleep for 3 hours last night because of it, and I feel the flight stress like a caged animal, wired, shaking and not able to be at peace or rest, fidgeting and pacing. We have to get this done, and I don't know how.

All I can do is put this in God's hands. He started us on this journey to adopt one of his children, and provide for an orphan. It's foundational to our faith.

Religion that God our Father accepts as pure and faultless is this: to look after orphans and widows in their distress and to keep oneself from being polluted by the world. - James 1:27

Jesus himself reminds us that we are adopted into His family, the adopted sons and daughters of God:

"I will not leave you as orphans; I will come to you. Before long, the world will not see me anymore, but you will see me. Because I live, you also will live. On that day you will realize that I am in my Father, and you are in me, and I am in you. Whoever has my commands and obeys them, he is the one who loves me. He who loves me will be loved by my Father, and I too will love him and show myself to him." - John 14:18-21

I can't believe that God would call us to such a journey, to follow his commands to take care of orphans, only to close this door at the end. He loves Xin Sha Gang, and us, but that doesn't mean that it is His will that we be together -- to me, this is the hard part of the Christian walk, to have will that is subordinate to the call of Christ. You cannot say, "No, Lord." This is very hard, the hardest struggle I've ever had.

Please continue to keep us in your prayers, that we will have peace and freedom from anxiety, and can get this resolved, one way or another, and grace.

10 days... wow

It's overwhelming to think that we have 10 days left until we will be leaving for China. It's going to be a crazy 10 days full of preparations to be gone from work for 3 weeks, tons of tasks to accomplish, final paperwork and checklists, and more.

Please keep us in your prayers. We are having substantial problems finding caregivers for Emily. In fact, we only have 1 day covered for sure, and 3 days of maybe, and we're distraught, desperate, and anxious. We can only rely on God at this point. Please please please pray for us that we can find trustworthy caregivers to take care of our daughter while we are in China. At the time of this great anticipation and joy, this is hanging over us like a dark cloud.

Chinese Church and Chinese Bibles

Of the many (MANY!) questions and details remaining about our trip, one is really resting heavily on my mind, and that's the plight of the oppressed Church in China, undergoing persecution for the cause of the Gospel.  I wish I knew if Chinese Christians can obtain Bibles, because I'd really like to take along several Chinese Bibles, but haven't been able to get reliable information.  I have the feeling there is a strong black market for Bibles, but just don't know.  I'm hoping to get the information soon, but it's still resting heavily on my mind.  Just one of the details that we need to track down in the next 13 (!!!) days.

Why are we adopting again? (part 2)

(Part 2 of 2)
Just before we traveled to get Rachael, Dan's mother passed away after a struggle with bone cancer. As we were sitting in the ICU waiting room, we talked with good friends of our family. They remarked that, when they had their little "surprise" 13 years after they thought they were done having kids, their mother encouraged them to have yet another, so their child wouldn't be lonely.

To make a long story short, that story made an impact. We realized that Rachael, having grown up in a crowded, noisy orphanage with dozens of friends, and the noisy Houser household, would find herself an effective "only child" at the age of 5. We realized that it was best for our family, and her, to have a sibling, hopefully a brother.

After soul searching, and lots of prayer, we decided to adopt from China again. We adopted a special needs child because we think we can handle another special needs child (our oldest, Emily, is also special needs). Also, it's about the only way you can get a boy from China, and we liked the idea of Rachael having a brother with a similar heritage. Even more to the point, we didn't want an infant due to our biological clocks, and decided a 3-5 year old was a better fit for us.

Why are we adopting again?

We get that question many times, and it comes in many forms.  The underlying question is often:

• You're freaking 42 years old, why are you adopting?
• Why are you adopting a 4th child, are you crazy?
• Wait, you have two teenagers, and a toddler, and you're adding another toddler?
• You already have a special needs child, why would you adopt a child with a health problem?

There are even some folks that insinuate something to the effect, "If you're going all the way to China, why aren't you getting a 'perfect' child?"

Prejudice aside, this is a complicated question, wrapped around the three little letters "why".  Why indeed!

When we decided to adopt Rachael, it was also a difficult decision, and one that God spoke to Becca about first, then it worked it's way into my heart.  Or, as I like to say, Becca whispered it into my ear, it fell to my wallet where it caused a sharp pain in the a$$, then slowly melted my heart.  Now, I wouldn't trade Rachael for the world.  She is our daughter, through and through, and I couldn't imagine life without her in our family.  We have three wonderful daughters, each with their own personality.  Are they always perfect, good, loving and lovable?  Heck, are any of us?  But I love them with every fiber in my being.

So, that's the background.  I'll continue this in another post.

TRAVEL DATES

We now have official travel dates!!!
We will leave on July 3, flying Columbus--Detroit--Tokyo--Beijing.
We return on July 18 flying Guangzhou--Tokyo--Detroit--Columbus.
I guess this is one time when a flight to Detroit sounds great! :)
Wow two weeks and we will be leaving.....Amazing.

Time line to Robby

June 2006: We decided that we wanted to add one more to or family. We made the decision to start the adoption process through the same agency we used with Rachael (A Helping Hand). God lead us to begin looking at the list of "waiting children". These are older children, many with special needs.

July: We began our homestudy, and looked at the current list of waiting children at AHH, but did not find 'our' child yet

August- December: we continued working on our homestudy while facing many delays and problems.

November 3: The new waiting child list arrives at AHH. We were drawn to two children, Sha Gang a three year old boy and a seven year old girl. After much prayer and a visit to Children's Hospital Adoption clinic, we decided to apply for Sha Gang.

December 3: We received a call from Grace at AHH telling us we had been chosen as Sha Gang's family. Becca got the call and remembers nothing Grace said after the initial "you have been referred Sha Gang". Becca was too busy crying and thanking Grace.

December 22: LOI sent to China. This is a 'Letter of Intent' stating that we wish to adopt Xin Sha Gang and telling a little bit about us and the proposed medical treatments he will receive.

2007
January 12: DTC Our dossier/homestudy finally went to China

January 18: PA We received our 'pre-approva;' to adopt Sha Gang

February 10 : LID Our dossier was logged in with the Chinese Adoption Authorities

May 17: LOA arrives. This is the 'Letter of Acceptance' were we state that, yes, we still want to adopt Sha Gang

May 22: LOA returned to China

June 14: We receive our TA. This is the travel approval from the Chinese Government that lets us plan the exact dates for our trip.

Our agency then contacts the US Embassy in China asking for an appointment to get Sha Gang's American paperwork done allowing him to enter the US and become a citizen. In three to five business days we will receive confirmation of an appointment. Then our final travel dates will be set. Right now it looks like we will travel the first three weeks of July

One more makes six

Yep, you read that right, soon there will be six in the Houser family. We have received a referral and travel approval for 新沙刚 Xin Sha Gang, a four year old boy living in Ürümqi, Xinjiang Autonomous Region, China!

We should be traveling to China to bring him home the first three weeks of July (exact dates to determined). Of course, we are all very excited to add Sha Gang to our family. We will be naming him Robert Adam after his maternal grandfather and his paternal great-grandfather.

Some vital stats on Robby:
birth date - April 7, 2004
34 pounds, 36 inches as of March
His Chinese name 新沙刚 means "New Sand Strong"

Update on Rachael

We are home almost two years now and as you can imagine life with a two year old and two teenagers is very hectic!! Rachael has adjusted amazingly well to our family....and I don't know what we would do without her, she is such a joy. Rachael is a very active, happy, loving almost three year old now. She loves Barney, Sesame Street and the Wiggles: anything she can dance to. Her favorite thing to play with is her big sister Kayla. They have really taken to each other and Kay does a great job with her. Kayla is even teaching her to do cheerleading stunts. :) Rachael has also discovered how to push all of Emily's 'buttons' and loves to tickle her.
Rachael, of course, is the most beautiful, adorable, smart two year old in the world.....that is when she is not being an ornery, bratty two year old. :)